Mermaids out of Water

The pumps were broken at the public pool I usually go to, so they shut it down for the day. I drove to another pool a little farther north. I was bummed about missing the aqua aerobics class at my pool, but at least I could go for a swim. It was the hottest day of the year so far and there was no way I wasn’t getting in the water. I’m almost 6 months pregnant and my lower back has been aching a lot lately. I swam a few laps in the easy lane and then took a break to stretch. I started talking to one of the lifeguards and she told me they had a gentle water fitness class in the smaller pool starting in ten minutes. Perfect! I swam a few more laps and went over.

There were a bunch of people already in the water when I got there. As soon as I started down the stairs, a few ladies came over and introduced themselves to me and then they introduced me to everyone else in the class. They were so nice to me and had lots of questions about my pregnancy and the baby. Then the instructor came and she kicked our butts for an hour. This was not the gentle fitness class I had imagined, but it was great. I could barely keep up while the people around me were killing it. They were racing me across the pool and showing me different exercises. It was so much fun. It’s also probably the best workout I’ve had in months. Okay fine, years.

After class I was starving so I hopped out of the pool and took a quick shower. When I got out, there were a bunch of older women in the locker room. Some of them were in wheelchairs and walking with walkers. One of them called out my name and asked me how I liked the class. I stared at her for a few seconds before realizing she was one of the women who had been in the pool with me. I looked around. They all were. I couldn’t believe it. These women seemed so… old. And slow. Nothing like the women in my class. I had met them in the water, where they were fast and free and totally unburdened by whatever was going on with their bodies the rest of the time. It was sad and also not sad.

I’m going to keep going to the class. I loved it and I feel like I stumbled through a secret portal where I got to see who these women really are. Or at least who they are underwater.




Charlotte’s Shorts won the ENCORE! Producer’s Award at the 2016 Hollywood Fringe Festival, which means we will be BACK for 2 more shows on July 30th & 31st. Get your tickets HERE!


We’ll be back soon!



Charlotte’s Shorts will be back at the Actor’s Company for 2 ENCORE performances on July 30th & 31st!

Every Show is a Little Different

Cast lists

Here are the full cast lists for our upcoming shows in the Hollywood Fringe Festival! Tickets available here.

A Word From Our Actors

What has Charlotte’s Shorts done for you?

We want to make a pilot of Charlotte’s Shorts and to do so we could really use your help! Find out how here. 

Help Us Take Charlotte’s Shorts to the NEXT LEVEL!

We are raising funds to help us cover the cost of filming our upcoming shows in the Hollywood Fringe Festival as well as our post-production costs, including editing, color correction, sound design, etc. 100% of funds raised will go toward producing a pilot of Charlotte’s Shorts. Maybe we pitch it to a network and all these incredible actors become super star gazillionaires. Or maybe we end up with a great DVD the whole family can enjoy (if your kids like sex talk and swearing.) Either way, we want to share Charlotte’s Shorts with more people and we could really use your help! Check out our campaign on Indiegogo here.

Charlotte’s Shorts in Hollywood Fringe Festival!

Tickets go on sale May 1st @

Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie: The danger of a single story | TED Talk |

This is my favorite TED talk ever. I guarantee it is worth 18 minutes and 42 seconds of your time.

The Nook

In all the excitement/exhaustion of remodeling our house last year, one small but pretty magical discovery was overlooked. We FOUND an extra little room in our house…

As we stripped off the old siding to insulate and weatherproof the house, we found a secret space in our bedroom.
We decided to put in a window. Yep. That’s a big hole in our bedroom.
New window from the outside.
From the inside.
We added a beam for support.
That was a lot of work!
It’s starting to look like a nook!
A warm nook! (all the blue is insulation.)
We added a closet.
Looking cozier.
Trim makes all the difference.
More details.
More trim and…
A single bed with drawers!
Or is it…
A double bed!
A nice cozy reading nook with a closet, drawers, and a bed! Now, it’s nap time.

Bean Boozled

Aleksy didn’t remember much about the crash. Luckily he had passed out before the truck went over the side of the mountain. Now, he was bleeding and aching all over. The whole truck was on its side and everything was dark. Aleksy fished around for his phone. There was no service, but he could the light. He climbed up to open the passenger door. It was freezing out! Even with his light, all he could see was trees covered in snow. He’d have to wait until morning to get help. As sore as Aleksy was from the crash, nothing compared to the hunger pains in his stomach. All he had eaten that day was a Slim Jim and 4 cups of free coffee from the truck stop. He wondered if there was any food in the trailer. HIs transport was from the Jelly Belly Candy Company. He opened the back doors and out tumbled hundreds of little boxes.

Aleksy flashed light on one of the boxes: Bean Boozled? Oh! Jellybeans! Aleksy laughed. Henryk and Feliks would love the story of how candy had saved their dad’s life. He grabbed an armful of boxes and climbed back into the cab. He tore open a box and poured some jellybeans into his mouth. Ten seconds later he spit them out. Was one of them rotten? He almost threw up the little food that was in his stomach, but fought to keep it down. What was going on?

He checked the box. It was a game. There were 20 flavors. Each good flavor had an identical nasty one. He’d have to take a chance on each jellybean he ate. Aleksy studied all the flavors and decided to try a light green one. It was either lime or lawn clippings. He bit it in half and chewed slowly. It was definitely not lime. But it wasn’t that bad. He ate all the light green ones from the boxes he had with him. Next, he chose the light blue ones: they were either blueberry or toothpaste. Not the best combination of flavors, but definitely not the worst. He ate them all.

As uncomfortable as he was, exhaustion set in and Aleksy fell asleep for hours. When he woke up, he checked his phone. 9am. Why was it still so dark? He shined light on the windows. They were covered with snow. He tried to open the passenger door, but it wouldn’t budge. Aleksy didn’t have the strength or energy to keep trying to open the door. Maybe eating some more jellybeans would help.

He studied the remaining flavors and chose the dark brown ones. Chocolate pudding or canned dog food. Didn’t sound too bad. Aleksy bit one in half and immediately vomited all over himself. The dog food flavor was disgusting and part of the jellybean was still stuck to his tooth. He tried to pry it off with his tongue and it made him throw up again. He wished he hadn’t eaten all the toothpaste ones.

He tried another flavor to get the awful taste out of his mouth. Agh! It was stinky socks. Aleksy felt hopeless. His phone had now officially died and he couldn’t see a thing. He grabbed a box. From now until his rescue or his death, he would have to blindly choose the flavors he ate.

Aleksy prayed for a good one. The smell of vomit was making his stomach turn. It wouldn’t take much to send him over the edge. He grabbed a jellybean and popped it into his mouth. Moldy cheese. It was gross, but he kept it down. One by one, Aleksy bit into the jellybeans, each time not knowing his fate. He was having a good run- ten in a row that he was able to swallow.

And then it happened. Skunk Spray. Aleksy’s eyes teared up and his nose burned. He spit it out, but it didn’t matter, the damage had been done. Aleksy’s life passed before his eyes. For the first time since the crash, he truly believed he would never see his family again.

Just then, a drop of water hit his cheek. Then another. They were coming in from the window. The snow was melting! Aleksy stood up and felt around for the door handle. He was able to move it slightly. He tried again using all the strength he had left and this time it swung open. Water and snow poured in on top of Aleksy, but he was able to climb out. He was soaked and freezing, but free! He looked around him. There were trees everywhere. He chose a direction and started walking. After what felt like hours the trees began to thin out. In the distance Aleksy could see a building, but he could not tell what it was. As he got closer, he could make out some red and green on the sign. R.J.’s Steakhouse. As Alexi walked up to the door, a poster caught his eye. It had a photo of a giant steak with the words “Free if you can eat it” written underneath.

Aleksy is the only man in history to have eaten the 72oz steak in one sitting and ask for seconds. His picture hangs on the wall in that steakhouse to this day.