First off, let me just start with the good news and say OMFG your wedding is TOMORROW!!!! Can you believe it? The bad news is I can’t go. Don’t worry, you will know why after you read this email. The thing is, I met a guy today at Kmart when I was looking for your present. His name is J’on. He is pretty fine and tall and looks sort of like Mike, but with less pimples. (Don’t worry I’m sure the Proactiv will work soon.) Is he going to wear make up for the pictures tomorrow? Gay. LOL just kidding or else he wouldn’t be marrying you!
Anyway, J’on and me were talking and we realized we were both single! He was a smooth talker he said he liked my thick booty and my pretty eyes. I gave him my number and he said he would call me tomorrow. I said ok and I didnt realize til after he was gone that your wedding is tomorrow too! I don’t think I’ll be able to hear my phone during the ceremony so I think I should just stay at my house.
I know we already rehearsed the dance and got the bridesmaid dress to fit me, but my cousin Erin said she would do it for me. Don’t worry she is a really fast learner. You can just go over the dance steps with her tomorrow before the ceremony or something. She is a little fatter than me and when she tried to put on the dress you bought me the zipper broke but the good news is she still fits into her dress from prom and it is blue too so don’t worry. Alright girl well have fun on your BIG day tomorrow. Wish me luck!!
Love you, Heidi
Hey P!S!!! Save me some cake!
6 thoughts on “Waiting for a Call”
loooooooooooooove it. typical l a girl. i hated it when a friend would make plans and then get a date and cancel. sooo funny char. i just love you so much and your talent just amazes me. you’re so much fun. glad you’re enjoying your life and your
experiences. keep up the stellar work.
The people that live in your head should never live OUTSIDE your head. LOL! I love the dark place! You are sooooooo funny and talented.
Very, very funny! Loved it!
this is so funny, the name change an amazing way to capture the depths of this woman’s disorder…
this is so good and the girl in the story is horrifying.
Haha that is absolutely horrible!